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Ever heard of Rebound Relationships?

Discussion
Jan 17, 2011
by: mbalanza

Have you ever experienced falling for someone you like, only to find out in the end that he/she just turned to you in order to get over his/her previous relationship easily? A 'rebound relationship' is one in which a person becomes overly quick to commit to a new partner after having experienced an upsetting break up.

A rebound relationship tends to have a negative character. This is found as an example on this article:http://www.divorceinfo.com/reboundrelationships.htm  It happens usually on those people, both man and woman who is still going through the period of coping from the pain of an ex lover and decides to involve themselves right away to someone new in order to conceal the strong emotions of anguish and heartache.

A rebounder will not necessarily know they are using you. As the rebound person, you need to be the stronger person. Be in control of the whole situation, and be straightforward and honest with your rebounder. Most importantly, if you want it to succeed, never pressure that person. Show them how strong you are and how serious you are about not wanting to be a rebound. If they see it from your perspective, they may end up thinking twice before hurting you. This is also found on this article: http://www.thatsfit.ca/2010/10/18/rebound-relationships/

When dealing with this type of relationship, we have to be cautious at the same time, most especially if the person who is involved just got out of a serious relationship. Obviously, it would not be easy for both sides. However, when the right time comes, we might find the right person meant truly for us. Everything else is worth the wait if we all know how to take it easy and let the pain fades away when the right time comes.

 

Comments

 Em I think your post is

Submitted by vmcbean on Sun, 2011-01-23 21:11.

 Em I think your post is important for alot of people to read, many times people just want to forget about the pain that they are dealing with and use other people to deal with it. Sometimes even good people do it too, some knowing what they are doing but having been hurt so bad just look for a way to get over it. It is important for everyone to know that they should deal with this pain and not allow anyone else to be hurt by your own feelings.

 Dear Vincent:     

Submitted by mbalanza on Mon, 2011-02-28 18:40.

 Dear Vincent:

     Thanks for your comment about my post. I'm pretty sure there's a lot of kids our age experience the same exact emotion that you are pertaining to. I believed that we are in a period of our lives where in we try to deal with things the hard way and figure out something worthwhile. Something that we could learn from that certain situation. From there, we would realized that not all the things in life could be acquired easily only because we want to. Our own personal experiences also serves as teacher in our lives as we grew older. We would eventually learn from our mistakes. 

Hi Em, I really like you

Submitted by kwilliams2 on Mon, 2011-02-28 18:42.

Hi Em,

I really like you post. As Vincent said, it is very important for others to read this post as many people have been in what you call a "rebound relationship". I agree with you saying "It happens usually on those people, both men and women who is still going through  the period of coping from the pain of an ex lover and decides to involve themselves right away to someone new in order to conceal the strong emotions of anguish and heartache."

Unfortunately, this is how these relationships start and although I highly disagree with them, they are all too common. They aren't fair to either person in the relationnship. The "rebounder" or person who was broken up with previously is not allowing themself to heal from the heartache caused. Then, from that, they don't allow themself to find someone they do like for all the right reasons. The person being rebounded is being toyed with. The rebounder doesn't really like them that way and they are just being used.

I aslo agree with you saying "When dealing with this kind of relationship, we have to be catious at the same time, most especially i fthe person who is involved just got out of a serious relationship." To me, this is pretty much the worst kind of rebounding. When the person is getting out of a relationship with just any person they liked, yes, there may be feelings involved but they aren't as deep as someone who was in a serious relationship for a number of years. The wound is deeper, will take longer to heal and it might cause the person to become involved in not just one, but multiple rebound relationships.

 Dear Kori:      I was

Submitted by mbalanza on Mon, 2011-02-28 18:59.

 Dear Kori:

     I was carried away with your in depth analysis and comment regarding my post about rebound relationships. I was struck with what you said, 'The person being rebounded is being toyed with.' I guess this is really a very strong point that you made. It may sound really damaging and upsetting at the same time. But it is absolutely true based on my perspective about this so-called 'rebound relationship.' To think it this way, simply just hearing it would already provide you an idea that the whole thing seems to be a selfish type of relationship. Obviously, the 'rebounder' being self-centered without even thinking that the situation he/she is dealing with was completely absurd in the first place.