I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK, AIGHT?!?!?! "\ ^O^ /"

The flare that was meant to keep me alive and happy only turned out to be a fireball filled with anger and resentment unto those who have done physical, emotional, and mental damage to me.The light that I shine is only artificial, not real. It's like some of my smiles. My smiles lately have been nothing else but fake happiness. Painted on my soul, slowly devouring my joy and happiness. The black hole in my heart slowly widens the more and more people get to me. They keep striking my nerves and one day I might snap. My mouth will be like fire with words that flare onto peoples minds and souls. Looking deep into my eyes, you can see the real me. The me that is unhappy with herself, confused on why she's here. The girl who's cried and cried, trying to figure out why life have to be such a b*tch. Growing up with words put into my head and then growing a little older to only find out the truth. Being eaten alive by what you thought was real but only a dream. That dream eventually turned into a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from. Confusion, anger, happiness, and hypocricy have all mixed together leaving a permanent mark on my soul. I am no longer the Evelyn everyone known me as, happy and full of joy, but the hypocrite girl who paints on smiles to please others. My bulb blew and won't be changed anytime soon. There is no reason to have a new bulb if people keep abusing the energy they recieve from it.